Hey there was a brief moment of sunshine today, so perhaps here in West Virginia we will have fireworks tonight.  Yay!

But for some families, fireworks and other loud events are difficult for children with sensitivities to noise and light and crowds.  So you wanna go to the fireworks (if it doesn’t rain!), but what to do about your kid or kiddies who hate the noise?

Well, there are ways to slowly help your child build up tolerance for loud noises and busy events.  If you are just starting to build up these “tolerance muscles,” then today you will have to go slowly and take it step by step.  However, as you slowly help your child learn to deal with more and more noise and bustle, you can slowly increase how much and how close you go to a noise-event like fireworks.

I spent many of my son’s early Fourth of July fireworks on a hillside past where the really loud fireworks could startle him.  If you are just starting today to try fireworks, this is the way to do it.  Sit far from the fireworks, away from the crowds and the biggest noise.  I helped my son hold his ears when he was little if he found the noise even too much from far away.

For crowds and bustle, this is another good strategy.  Sit far away from the crowd, but perhaps invite a few people to sit with you.  Lots of kids with or without special needs find fireworks overwhelming, so there are always other families grateful to you for providing a safe space.  Build up slowly, year by year, until your children can deal with larger crowds.

I know families who use noise-cancelling earphones for events, but these are not much protection from the boom sounds of many fireworks.  So, yes, if you use them, bring them along, but I still advise not getting too close and building up tolerance slowly.

And check in with your child(ren).  Even at a distance, when he was three and four, my son could not sit through an hour of fireworks.  I was the parent who took him home early, since I can take or leave fireworks.  If you are in a couple, and one spouse/partner prefers fireworks, then the other parent can be the taker-home parent!  If you both like fireworks, then best to share this:  one year, one parent takes home, and one year the other.

What about families like mine?  Two of mine struggled with the noise of fireworks and my youngest loved them?  And what to do as a single parent?  Well, strategize!  Can you go with friends who will bring your noise-loving child home after the display?  Can you do some fireworks at home with your noise-lover while the quiet one(s) get some downtime with books or videos?  Can another family member take the quiet-loving kids home instead?  Have a plan and be prepared.  Sometimes even noise-loving kids lose it on the fourth of July!

And talk with the kids ahead of time.  If you have noise lovers and noise haters, talk about how everyone gets a little of what they need.  If you are a family who all hates noise, then maybe plan on 15 minutes and then heading home – with a treat on the way!  Tell everybody that if one of you gets overwhelmed and melts down then you as a family have to take care of one another and go home.  After all, special needs or not, we all melt down.  We all need care.  That is what family is for.

With all these ideas, the Fourth of July isn’t so difficult and overwhelming for parents!  You can plan ahead, try short outings with lots of distance to the noise, and year by year slowly build up to getting closer.  Or you may be a family that decides that the Fourth is a great day to watch a movie together, to go on hikes or camping, or to go ride bikes or do puzzles around the table.

The Fourth of July can be a lot for noise-sensitive kids (and noise-sensitive parents).  But as a family you have the opportunity to make this holiday fun for everyone, with less stress, and more emphasis on being together and successful.  I hope these ideas help!

Happy Fourth of July to all our families!